LG!

Tomorrow, Nov 17th, it’s been a year since you left, and “dang” what a year it’s been. If there’s ever been a year I needed some Laura Getch wisdom, encouragement, and wit-it has been this past year. While thinking about you so much with your home-going anniversary here- I realized I’m pretty ticked at you for several reasons, can’t flipping call and tell you so I write…

• That white hoodie you borrowed from me the night Shane passed, you were always cold, even then, and had to have a sweatshirt, my hoodie. I remember just a few days after you saying, “ yea DeeDee, you’re not getting that hoodie back, that thing has the Holy Spirit all over it, I’m keeping it.” You got me at a weak moment and think I was like yea whatever. But now I want it back, I mean you don’t need it, you kept it cause Holy Spirit was “on it” and now you are literally smack dab in HIS presence. Thinking that white Holy Spirit hoodie is at Goodwillt and my friend is in the presence of Jesus, you don’t even need to feel the Holy Spirit, you’re with HIM!! Selfishly I want you both back. But woah-a whole year in the presence of our Savior-i wished you could give me the Laura Getch insight. I smile big thinking of you there. As much as I miss you it brings me pure joy that you are where you are. 

•I never got to tell you but but that situation that you kinda encouraged  because you thought it was a good situation, and then later was very adamant that ending it needed to happen because you realized it actually was no good for me-(can hear you still, “DeeDee, what are you doing?”) Well, I finally listened to you and God and several others and removed myself from it and look, you’re not even here to remind me of the whys and what fors-you skipped out LG!! Betting you’re still proud of me tho. 😉

•We mothered together -we did it wayyyy different but we did it together. I’m still mothering these adult children of ours and I’m CLUELESS and could definitely be having some deep conversations with you, and you could be shaking your head and crying and laughing with me about so much. BTW-our adult kids are the BEST, but you already knew that-W, K, and E are doing as well as can be expected with you not here. I’ve tried not to smother them but  try to let them know I’m here, I’m definitely not you, but I’m fairly sure they know I love them and I’ve got them in my heart, my thoughts and my prayers. Our children’s friendships are solid and I’m so very thankful for that. Really upset that you and I are not going to get to enjoy mothering these 5+ as adults together because they are just bigger versions of those lil kids growing up and they bring me so much joy to me.

I think you heard and somehow experienced all that this time last year-some of the sweetest moments. This fact of not having you here may make me the most upset. JSM? -well they are realizing grieving someone they love as an adult looks lots different than as a child and realizing it just still sux. We 4 speak and remember you all the dang time. 

•I could really hear some Laura Getch wisdom in the area of trying to understand so much in our world. Jack,as you affectionately called him, and I recently had one of my favorite things about having grown kids -conversations-and we were talking about how nothing is ever really constant. I was telling him that even at my age it’s just hard to grasp. He and I both having the realization that people that we think are going to be here forever are just not. Either they leave for better things like you have or they leave because of heart change, or circumstances which changes life. Just hard to let the consistencies go when those consistencies are sometimes people. Both of us realizing how death changes so much of life that you know. Also realizing it’s a hard reality to swallow when people change, or when people end up being not who they say they are, which I’m finding at my advanced age, may just be harder than the grief that comes with death. Hard to realize our expectations are sometimes just not going to be met. Just so hard when traditions will be different because of the absence of people, and when people are no longer in our lives that have been there for as long as we can remember for whatever reason. I know you’d have some words and insight for me, and you’d encourage Jack with some quick wit. I reminded him that the one and only thing in our lives that is constant is Jesus Christ, I’m sure you’d remind us both of that fact too. You always had a way of turning my face and eyes back to HIM!

•I’m upset because you’ve, yet again,  changed my life and you know I have a hard time with change. First you changed it with your presence 23 years ago, you came in to my life so different from me, but really the same. I didnt know I needed you then, but God knew I’d need your steadfast friendship through raising kiddos, and  for you to walk through ,so closely, one of the hardest seasons of my life. Always encouraging,always praying and always reminding me “you can do hard things.” We  did so much differently, but dang if we didn’t love the same-deep and loyal. You taught me so much about walking in faith, even in the muck of it. I think you’d be proud of me tho as I’ve had to let people go either by death or by choice, my dependency on God has grown so so much. I’ve realized with the absence of you and a few others that my usual phone calls for some wisdom or advice, and the ha-decision making (you’d be so proud of me with my decision making) I turn to God more and people less-through His Word and prayer. So yet again, instead of your presence, it’s your absence that’s  changed me. I can honestly say there’s just not a day goes by that I don’t think of you and how your sweet life, your  friendship, your fight has affected me. I only hope I have had the same effect on others at the end of my life here as you have mine. 

This past year was definitely a year felt without you here in so many ways, one of the harder years for sure LG. 

My friend, I promise to respect your memory and continue to revel you and your impact on mine and our children’s and others lives. You were so worth it.  I promise still, to love your kiddos and keep your memory alive.

And as always, I’ll give you a pass on all these things I’m upset about…cause well you’re Laura Getch, and you’d probs say something like, “Deedee, get over it, you got this.”  

I love you, I miss you, and I’ll see you soon. 💛 

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