Rough Waters and Red Flags

 This one’s been brewing and it’s taken me awhile to put fingers to keys to get this one out. I’m wading into waters that I don’t like to wade into-concerning red flags, discernment and water. I love the ocean, bodies of water but I also fear water. I love the massiveness and beauty, the closeness I feel to my Creator when I’m at the ocean, how it constantly changes and brings peace one moment but can be so angry and scare me the next. I’m also terrified of the massiveness and power of it all and always the unknown…tis in life and relationships. All the things I love about it are also the things I fear about it. Sometimes we find ourselves in relationships and situations that can feel like the ocean, ever changing, unpredictable, and sometimes beautiful. 

At my age Ive had some learning experiences. Some of those experiences have been uncharted waters for sure. As I look back I’m thankful that God has, in His grace, let me experience these waters like I’ve experienced the ocean time and again. Guess we have to be in it to learn about it. 

Some days there’s those small waves that I do not mind being in, and calm clear water that I can see the ocean floor, I can see what’s swimming around me, even enjoy the treasures at my feet. And sometimes the water and experience is like those waves that will knock your feet right out from under you, there’s no way to even see your feet or see what’s around because the water is so very murky. These times, I usually choose to sit beside the water and enjoy from a distance. Sad and scary thing is-in life sometimes we don’t get the luxury of just sitting and watching, sometimes we open our eyes and realize we are chest deep in those scary waves and murky waters before we know it. It’s then the water feels like it’s crushing you, when you can’t breathe, and you feel somewhat paralyzed. Sometimes, that’s what life feels like. 

Sometimes it’s our own choosing to enter these waters. Sometimes we end up here because maybe our sight has deceived us, or our heart, the water looks inviting, clear, it’s enticed us. We keep moving into it deeper and deeper and before long we need a floatation device to save us before the current sweeps us right away. In those times there’s usually been clear signs to not go in the water. Thankfully,  at some beaches those signs are clear…flags. Green flag-water is good, no hazard, yellow flag-proceed with caution, light currents and surf, and the double red flag-water is closed, purple flag-there’s some things swimming that you don’t want to swim with. I tend to be a rule follower and I’m not a swimmer so I’ve always taken these flag colors serious and the warnings they indicate to heart, ha-if only I’d always adhere to the warnings in life. 

Oh how I wish God used flags for us, not our own discernment. Wouldn’t that be so much easier? How I wished He’d throw up a green one when He saw me heading in the right direction, when that person or situation was safe. If He would just throw up a yellow  flag when He saw that the situation or person is somewhat safe but remind me to proceed with caution, and couldn’t He just throw up double red flags 🚩 🚩 when He’s like ‘DeAnn, turn around, don’t head that way, not into that situation or that persons vicinity,’ and a purple flag when He saw me about to enter into something that could eat me right up. How much simpler would life be if God waved them for us? Our loving gracious God may not wave them per se , but He does give us the same warnings…through discernment. 

I’ve been guilty of saying,”I don’t have the gift of discernment.” WRONG-God has given me His Spirit so I most certainly do have the wonderful gift of discernment. But my flesh will sometimes allow me to discount, drown out this precious gift so I can get what I want, what I desire, what I think I need over what God knows is best for me. All of that fleshy desire is what cancels out that sweet gift of discernment. 

Looking back, there’s proof in that gift inside of me. I’ve known when my spirit has said that person or situation is not ok, not safe, not something/someone you should seek out, or even have a relationship with.  Some of those  times Ive been obedient to that “still small voice” and turned around and walked, and other times I blatantly ignored it and proceeded straight into the waters aka relationships/situations. Sometimes I jumped in  because the waters were made to LOOK calm and clear when in reality, was murky, rough, can’t see your own feet kind of water. It’s these times there should have been a double red flag, with purple underneath-but would I have paid attention??

At times the water is cool and feels too good to walk out of,  comforting even, and then sometimes too cold to breathe, other times so strong that you become paralyzed with fear to move and sometimes it’s so rough making you want to run for the safety of the beach. 

Whew! Once on the beach and safe-you look back and you question why you ever even entered in the first place. You remember there were flags waving warnings, “lifeguards” saying don’t go there, but you proceed anyway. You hear God but ignore him-straight up disobedience. 

Once out and safe and usually disoriented from the ordeal-you realize you’re finally actually safe, you made it out! Sometimes it’s hard to catch your breath when you realize how close you were to drowning, losing yourself, or being eaten up by something you could not see. 

When you realize God gave you the warnings, the flags, you were just blatently disobedient for so long and the water felt too good every now and again, so you stayed, but stayed way way too long!

But God…

Thankfully He threw you a floatation device, or gently guided you out or maybe just threw you in the beach. Ha! He let you see that the water was too rough and powerful and He gave you strength to walk right out of what He knew wasn’t for you. Thankfully, in your disobedience HE still teaches, it wasn’t wasted, He let you learn some extremely valuable lessons-

1. I’ve learned to stay close to Him so your discernment doesn’t get clouded by the world-the flags are flying, your discernment is working, so pay attention through His Word, prayers, godly counsel. His Spirit is a gift that He gave because He knew we’d need the guidance, the warnings, His Word-our flag of sorts provides wisdom and truth when things are murky. So thankful-and now if I’ll just learn to see them and proceed accordingly.  

If I’m being  honest my gift of discernment sometimes shocks me. My complaint of not having the gift of discernment is somewhat of a cover-up I guess -for getting what I want instead. So many times I’ve literally realized that my “gut” “that feeling” has been spot on, almost every time. As I look back I’ve  always seen the signs, the proverbial 🚩-I just ignored it and thought my way was better than Gods. 

There’s a quote-“when someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.”~Maya Angelou . Kinda like when the ocean is showing you its power, roughness, don’t go in the water, believe what it’s showing you, before you’re in way over your head. 

If I would just learn to trust my gut, my spirit, I’d save myself lots and lots of near drowning moments. But sometimes I think God allows me to enter rough waters as He watches me and allows me to experience and learn as much as I can about Him and about me that I wouldn’t learn otherwise, but  He won’t let me get too far. And for that I’m so grateful. 

2.Ive learned also that He will give you people that are “lifeguards”-they warn you, tell you to run and stay out or don’t go near the water but even if you decide to ignore the warnings they are there  to resuscitate you when you are overtaken by rough waters, and situations. Those days you are disoriented and don’t know which way is in or out, up or down -they guide you to safety, give you strength to walk out and provide care for when you finally make it out. Thankful for my lifeguards-friends/family that patiently watched and administered “CPR” if you will. I learned that His grace is sufficient when I’ve been so very disobedient -not listening, ignoring my spirit, ignoring my sweet gift of discernment. 

He gives me wisdom and strength to keep my head above water and to walk right out of the rough waters (away from people and situations that are not for me.) 

Thankful He gives me wisdom when I ask, and even when I don’t ask, strength to pull myself up and out and back to safety, onto the beach and in His arms -this is where I choose to be. Thank you God for the gift of discernment, for giving me the Holy Spirit to help me navigate and for saving me from rough waters time and again, for giving me lifeguards in life to pull me up when the water overtakes me. Help me trust the discernment you give me and help me listen and learn. 

“When you pass through rough waters,

    I will be with you;

and when you pass through the rivers,

    they will not sweep over you…”~Isaiah 43:2